It’s been a rough couple of weeks in my art world. I began learning about art through oil painting. I started with watching Gary Jenkins’ and Bob Ross on PBS. I was more interested in painting roses with, Gary than mountain scenes with, Bob. I have, however, done both. My roses are much better than my mountains.
A few years ago when I was still on Facebook, I began to follow the pages of botanical artists. Most of the artists I admired happened to be women. These women could paint anything and make it look amazing. I desperately wanted to be able to create master pieces of botanical art as they did. I began to look around for classes. The closest classes to my home were an hour away at the Denver Botanical Gardens. Each class was $300.00. By the time you finished the full course you would have spent close to $3000.00.
Just about every artist out there has gone through this struggle. While I fully understand the value of in-person instruction where you have physical access to a teacher, sometimes it just is not possible and you have to find what works for you. I think I may have found this in an online instructor.
I am presently having a bit of a melt down over how difficult I find drawing to be as well as trying to learn colored pencil and watercolor techniques. I went through the same thing with oil painting. I don’t have learning curves, I have learning breakdowns. Can you relate?
Numerous times have I signed up for, and then canceled, this course. Not because it is a terrible course, but because it is difficult for me and things usually come easier to me. I tend to be very hard on myself when I learn something new. If it takes too long for me to ‘get it’ I wonder what is wrong with me. I’m sure none of you can relate to that!
I have, on numerous occasions, questioned the logic of spending money on this class. I mean come on, it’s been two lessons now and I still cannot draw a mind blowing masterpiece. I perused the blog of the instructor. Her first attempt at botanical art is not that great. It looks childish in fact. Her present day art looks amazing.
I feel rushed to do well because of situations in my life. If I were good at something that others would want to buy, I could possibly take care of myself if my husband were to pass away first. he is presently the only bread winner in our home. If he doesn’t bring home the bacon, we don’t have bacon. I want what I want and I want it to be delivered at the end of a three minute montage like what we sometimes see in movies. The music plays, and by the time it ends, the lead character has completed their transformation. They are ready to advance to the next level of their life. When they do, they of course crush whatever they were trying to do. By the end of the movie, all problems have been solved, goals accomplished and hearts have been won over.
Patience is not my strong suit. I’m going to stick with this class. I have wanted to learn botanical illustration for oh about 5+ years. I can’t crush it if I give up now can I? Nopety, nope, nope, nope.
What are you presently ‘crushing’?